1. |
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CONSTANT MIGRAINES. GOD BLESS THE INTERNET. HYPOTHERMIA. SMOKING A CARDBOARD CIGARETTE. SPILT MILK AND TISSUES. I DON'T FEEL VERY WELL. FISTFUL OF PUBIC HAIR. I'VE LOST ALL MY BRAINCELLS. SUCKER PUNCH. KNOCKED OUT COLD. BUSTED LIP AND MISSING TEETH. QUIET MAN. ANGRY CHILD. FORCED HIS DAD TO COOK SOME BEEF. SPIDER BITES MAKE ME CUM. SHOOTING EGGS OUT OF MY ASS. GLOWING PILE. NUCLEAR WASTE. I JUST WANNA SMOKE SOME GRASS AND SLED FAST.
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2. |
A ROOM FULL OF IDIOTS
04:09
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STUCK IN A ROOM FULL OF IDIOTS TELLING ME USELESS TIDBITS OF THINGS THAT I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND. JUST SITTING THERE WITH THEIR DICKS IN THEIR HANDS. MY BRAIN FEELS LIKE IT'S GONNA BLOW UP AND I FORGOT WHY I EVEN SHOWED UP. SHOULD'VE BROUGHT SOME IBUPROFEN. THESE ASSHOLES ARE DOING MY HEAD IN. YOUR MOUTH MOVES UP AND DOWN. I TRY NOT TO HEAR THE SOUND. IN YOUR STUPID WORDS I DROWN. SOMEONE GET ME OUT OF HERE NOW. THE NECKBEARD SAYS HE CAN'T FIND A GIRL. HIS GREASY HAIR MAKES ME WANNA HURL. THE EDGELORD TRIES TO INTIMIDATE. HIS POSER BEHAVIOR IS WHAT I HATE. THE TALK GOES ON AND ON AND ON. EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM'S A MORON. AND I KEEP LOSING CONSCIOUSNESS. THIS WHOLE SITUATION IS A HOT MESS. I THINK IT'S TIME THAT YOU WRAP THIS UP. YOU FUCKING HEARD ME. WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT UP? WAIT, HOLD ON A SECOND. I THINK SOMEONE SAID SOMETHING THAT SOMEONE ELSE DIDN'T LIKE. THEY HAVE A LOOK IN THEIR EYE. A LOOK THAT SAYS THEY WANNA KILL. JUST CALM DOWN NOW. THERE'S NO NEED TO RESORT TO VIOLENCE IN A SITUATION LIKE THIS. PLEASE JUST STOP IT. STOP IT. BLACK EYES. BROKEN NOSE. BRUISED FISTS. FRACTURED SKULL. I GUESS THIS IS WHAT GOES DOWN IN A ROOM FULL OF IDIOTS.
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3. |
WET NIGHTMARE
01:40
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I CAN'T HELP BUT WONDER IF ALL THE MISSING PEOPLE ARE LOCKED UP IN THE SAME UNDERGROUND SEX DUNGEON. THAT OLD HOMELESS GUY DOWN THE STREET THINKS HE HAS SOMETHING TO SAY BUT REALLY HE'S JUST A FUCKING CURMUDGEON. I DIDN'T SAY ONE GODDAMN WORD TO THAT GUY BUT FOR SOME REASON HE WANTS TO FEED ME TO A GRIZZLY BEAR. HE CAUGHT ME AND HIS MOMMY MAKING BABIES IN HIS BEDROOM AND NOW HE SUFFERS FROM CONSTANT WET NIGHTMARES. THEY VIOLENTLY SHAKE WITH FEAR WHEN THEY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO TO THEM YET. I DON'T KNOW WHY BUT I ALWAYS TEND TO WAKE UP IN A POOL OF MY OWN SWEAT. AND SHE DOES NOT APPEAR TO BE AWARE THAT I AM UNWELL, ANNOYED, AND READY TO TELL HER TO JUST FUCK OFF RIGHT NOW. I BROKE MY FACE WITH A BASEBALL BAT BECAUSE I'D RATHER DIE THAN BABYSIT THAT BRAT. AND HE ALWAYS CARRIES A POCKET KNIFE IN THE EVENT THAT SOMEONE TRIES TO TAKE HIS LIFE.
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4. |
FIBROUS MASS
02:42
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THERE'S A FIBROUS MASS GROWING OUT OF MY HEAD THAT'S BECOMING A CAUSE FOR CONCERN. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW IT GOT THERE BUT IT'S ALREADY BEEN GIVING ME PROBLEMS. I'M TOO AFRAID TO GO OUTSIDE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT ANYONE TO SEE IT. AND FURTHERMORE I THINK THIS THING'S DEVELOPING A VOICE. AND IT'S TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING. IT ITCHES AND BURNS TO THE POINT WHERE IT'S CAUSING ME PAIN. AND IT'S TRYING TO TELL ME TO DO ALL THESE AWFUL THINGS. IT GROWS BIGGER AND BIGGER WITH EACH PASSING DAY AND IT WILL NOT STOP UNTIL I HAVE BECOME ITS SLAVE. THIS FUCKING TUMOR HAS BEEN TALKING TO ME ON THE REGULAR. THE THINGS THAT IT TELLS ME I SHOULD DO ARE HORRENDOUS AND ABSURD. I TRY TO IGNORE IT SO THAT IT'LL TAKE THE HINT AND LEAVE ME ALONE. BUT EVERY TIME I DO IT JUST KEEPS ON GETTING LOUDER AND LOUDER. WHY CAN'T YOU JUST GO AWAY? LIFE ISN'T FUN WITH THIS THING STILL AROUND. WHY AM I THE ONE FORCED TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT. YOUR CONSTANT NAGGING VOICE IS DRIVING ME INSANE. SOMEBODY ANYONE PLEASE GET THIS OFF OF ME.
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5. |
THE TIN FOIL HAT BRIGADE
03:55
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I KNOW ABOUT THIS GROUP OF WEIRDOS WHO LIKE TO WEAR STRANGE HATS ON THEIR HEADS. THEY SAY IT'S PROTECTION FROM THE MIND WAVES THAT ARE USED TO TORTURE US UNTIL WE'RE ALL DEAD. ARE YOU SICK OF ALL THOSE BAD MEN TRACKING EVERY MOVE YOU MAKE? ARE YOU AFRAID THAT IF YOU SHOUT THE TRUTH YOU'LL END UP DEAD IN A LAKE? DO YOU WANNA FIGHT BACK AGAINST THE EVIL THAT PLAGUES OUR WORLD TODAY? THEN YOU SHOULD COME ON DOWN AND JOIN THE TIN FOIL HAT BRIGADE. THEY'RE TRYING TO MAKE THIS WORLD A BETTER PLACE TO LIVE. BUT WHAT THEY DON'T REALIZE IS THEIR EFFORTS ARE ALL IN VAIN. THEY THINK WE LOOK AT THEM LIKE THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF HEROES. BUT WHAT THEY DON'T REALIZE WE ALL THINK THEY'RE COMPLETELY INSANE. THE EARTH IS IN GREAT DANGER AND IT'S UP TO US TO SAVE IT. BECAUSE IF WE DON'T DO SOMETHING WE'LL ALL BE IN A WORLD OF SHIT. THE LIZARD MEN ARE GONNA KILL US ALL AND THE SATANISTS ARE TRAFFICKING OUR KIDS AND THE ALIENS WILL HARVEST OUR NATURAL RESOURCES UNTIL OUR PLANET IS A DRY AND EMPTY HUSK. SO OPEN YOUR EYES AND SEE FOR YOURSELF. WE UNDERSTAND IT'S EASIER TO LOOK THE OTHER WAY. BUT YOU KNOW DEEP DOWN IT'S NOT THE RIGHT THING TO DO. SO COME AND HELP US WITH OUR CAUSE AND FIGHT FOR YOUR RIGHT TO STAY ALIVE. PLEASE SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTHS AND GO BACK ON YOUT MEDS. ALL OF THE THINGS YOU FEAR, IT'S ALL JUST IN YOUR HEAD. EVERYTHING THAT YOU SAY IS JUST A BUNCH OF SHIT. YOU'RE SIMPLY NOTHING MORE THAN A GROUP OF FUCKING IDIOTS.
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6. |
BATHE IN BUBBLING TAR
02:23
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MY GUMS ARE RED AND SORE. MY EYES ARE FULL OF BLOOD. ALL MY ANNOYING NEIGHBORS DIED IN A FLASH FLOOD. THERE IS A REASON I DON'T TRUST YOU TO DRIVE MY CAR. I DARE YOU TO TAKE A BATH IN A POOL OF BUBBLING TAR. DUMBASSES ON THE TRAIN MAKE ME FEAR FOR MY LIFE. PREGNANT CHICKS ON A PLANE, I DON'T WANNA BE YOUR WIFE. LAY YOUR EGGS IN THE EASTER BASKET. I'LL SHOOT YOU IN THE FACE. CHECK OUT MY NIPPLE PIERCINGS. THIS AIN'T THE TIME OR PLACE. WHY DID WE HAVE TO WAIT SO LONG? I FOUND MY GIRLFRIEND ON BESTGORE DOT COM. I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO SUCK THE UDDERS OF A DAIRY COW. AND IF IT WEREN'T FOR LEXAPRO I'D PROBABLY BE DEAD RIGHT NOW. I WANNA TRY TO MAKE YOU CRY BY TELLING YOU YOUR CHILDREN DIED. AND I DON'T TRUST A WORD YOU SAY BECAUSE YOUR MOUTH IS FULL OF LIES. I WISH YOU DIDN'T HAVE THE URGE TO LICK MY MOTHER'S TOES RIGHT NOW. AND IF IT WEREN'T FOR THOSE CATHOLIC PRIESTS HE'D PROBABLY BE SAFE AND SOUND. I WANNA DUMP ASS ON YOUR FACE FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT. AND THEY CAN TRY AS HARD AS THEY WANT BUT THEY WILL NEVER MAKE THINGS RIGHT. I WASN'T ABLE TO PASS THE TEST BUT I THINK THAT'S FOR THE BEST.
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7. |
GUM UNDER THE DESK
03:11
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I TOOK THIS JOB SO I COULD PAY MY RENT. BUT NOBODY TOLD ME HOW MUCH IT WOULD FUCKING SUCK. YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE THE MESSES THESE TEENAGE MONSTERS CREATE. TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU. I HATE MY FUCKING JOB. EVERY MORNING I WISH I DIDN'T WAKE UP AND HAVE TO CLEAN THIS FILTHY MONSTROSITY. I CAN'T BELIEVE THE THINGS I HAVE TO SEE. JUST THINKING ABOUT IT MAKES ME QUEASY. JUST THINKING ABOUT IT MAKES ME SICK. DEAD MICE IN THE AIR VENTS. ROTTING FOOD IN THE LUNCHROOM. USED CONDOMS IN THE BATHROOM STALLS. CHEWING GUM STUCK UNDER THE DESKS. DIRTY CLOTHES ON THE LOCKER ROOM FLOOR. I WON'T BE ABLE TO FORGET THE SMELL. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE I CAN TAKE BEFORE I COMPLETELY LOSE MY MIND. I DON'T GET PAID ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH THIS FUCKING SHIT. THESE GOD FORSAKEN KIDS ARE DRIVING ME INSANE. THOSE FUCKING ASSHOLES HAVE MADE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL. THEY ALL LIKE TO POINT AND LAUGH AT ME FOR THE WORK I HAVE TO DO. I JUST WANTED TO MAKE SOME EXTRA CASH SO I COULD AFFORD TO LIVE. BUT I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD BE THIS BAD. FUCK YOU ALL. I FUCKING QUIT.
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8. |
EYES GLAZED LIKE DONUTS
02:45
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I WANTED TO GO TO THE PLACE WHERE THE BEAVERS DANCE. BUT I COULDN'T GET THERE BECAUSE OF ALL THE SQUIRRELS IN MY PANTS. THEY'RE GETTING SICK OF ME TELLING THEM TO STOP. THEY LOOKED AT ME WITH EYES GLAZED OVER LIKE DONUTS FROM THE PASTRY SHOP. I CAN'T SEEM TO FIGHT THIS FEELING. TALK SHIT TO THE BULL THAT'S RAGING. HOW DO I TELL YOU? THE WORDS ARE THERE BUT THEY AREN'T COMING OUT. WHAT DO I SAY? I DON'T WANNA HAVE TO LET YOU DOWN. SHE TRIED TO STAB ME IN THE FACE WITH A KITCHEN KNIFE. AND ALL BECAUSE I SIMPLY REFUSED TO EXPLAIN TO HER THE MEANING OF LIFE. HE WON'T STOP RANTING AND RAVING. DUMB FUCK, CAN'T YOU SEE I'M BLEEDING OUT? GET ON YOUR KNEES AND LICK YOUR FOOD UP OFF THE HARDWOOD FLOOR. WHEN WILL YOU FIGURE OUT IT'S YOUR BEHAVIOR THAT I ABHOR? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. THEY BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF HIM BECAUSE HE'S DRESSED LIKE A FOX. AND I SHIVER IN FEAR WHENEVER I SEE SOMEONE WITH CHICKENPOX.
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9. |
LOW-HANGING FRUIT PUNCH
03:28
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i dreamed i was an elf on the shelf watching the children eat their lunch. the family cat fell down the stairs and knocked over a bowl of low-hanging fruit punch. and as i stared into the distance i couldn't help but wonder why it felt like nothing mattered anymore. will i still feel the same when i die? i dreamed that i was floating in space and a lonely creature passed me by. he asked me if i wanted to be his friend. the desperation in his eyes made me start to cry. i woke up in a state of confusion. what do all of these things mean. i don't know, and maybe i never will.
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10. |
HEAD FILLED WITH WASPS
02:16
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I GOT A HEAD FILLED WITH WASPS THAT ARE STINGING MY BRAIN AND A MOUTHFUL OF ANTS THAT TASTE LIKE SHIT. AND EVERY TIME I GO TO YOUR HOUSE I WANNA STICK MY COCK IN THE FIRE PIT. HIS JOINTS ARE SORE AND HIS FINGERS ARE NUMB AND HE CONSTANTLY WONDERS WHY HE FEELS DUMB. I'M TAKING A RIDE ON HALLEY'S COMET WHILE EATING A BOWL OF MY OWN VOMIT. AND EVERY TIME I INJURE MYSELF ALL OF MY FRIENDS TELL ME THAT WAS LIT. I CAN'T SEEM TO FIND ANY FUCKS TO GIVE ABOUT YOU TELLING ME HOW I NEED TO LIVE. MY GUTS HAVE TIED THEMSELVES IN A KNOT AND I WANNA KILL THAT THEME PARK MASCOT. THE TREES HAVE ALL COMMITTED GENOCIDE AGAINST THE BUGS. AND I JUST SAW A CRACKHEAD DRINKING URINE FROM A JUG. I DON'T WANNA GO WITH YOU TO THE CORNFIELDS IF YOU'RE GONNA SACRIFICE ME. THEY'LL NAIL ME TO THE CROSS. EVERY TIME I LOOK AWAY FROM A CRIMSON WALL MY VISION STARTS TO TURN GREEN. YOU SHALL BE DROWNED IN SLIME. SHOVE YOUR FACE INTO THE DIRT AND LET A GROUP OF EARTHWORMS CRAWL INTO YOUR EYES. SERVE ME SOME MAGGOT CHEESE. THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL I'LL EVER LET YOU BACK INTO MY MISERABLE LIFE. IT'S BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU. WAIT, STOP. WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME? FUCK OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE.
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11. |
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STARING DOWN AT A DOG IN A COMA. ROTTING FLESH GIVES OFF A STRANGE AROMA. KICK THAT FUCKER IN THE BALLSACK. SHRUNKEN HEADS ARE BEING POKED WITH THUMBTACKS. WHO'S GONNA TELL HIM THAT HOUSE IS HAUNTED? BILLY'S EYELASH GOT EVERYTHING IT WANTED. I DON'T WANNA BE YOUR LOVER. FLASHING LIGHTS. ONE SEIZURE AFTER ANOTHER. SOME ASSHOLE TRIED TO BEAT MY FACE IN. I FORCE-FED HIM A BOTTLE OF RITALIN. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THE THINGS I SAY. WHAT'S THE POINT OF FUCKING YOU ANYWAY?
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12. |
FALLOPIAN TUBE AMPLIFIER
03:42
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THEY DON'T FEEL RIGHT IN THEIR OWN SKIN. THEY JUST WANNA BE COMFORTABLE WITH THEMSELVES. PLEASE STOP TREATING THEM LIKE THEY'RE A FREAK. GIVE THEM THE BASIC HUMAN RIGHTS THEY DESERVE. I JUST WANNA BE ABLE TO LIVE MY LIFE. THE WAY I WANT TO LIVE IT SHOULDN'T MATTER TO YOU. WE CALL THIS PLACE THE LAND OF THE FREE, SO WHY DO YOU PERSECUTE ME FOR ALL THE THINGS I DO AND SAY? EVERYTHING'S FALLING APART. HER STOMACH'S GROWN FAT WITH LIFE. BUT SHE DOESN'T THINK HER BODY CAN HANDLE IT ALL. PLEASE DON'T LOOK AT HER LIKE SHE'S A KILLER. IF SHE GOES THROUGH WITH THIS THEN SHE WILL SURELY DIE. THEY HAD A DREAM WHERE WE COULD LIVE THE WAY WE WANT TO. THEY WOULD BE ASHAMED OF WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW. EVERYTHING FALLS APART. YOUR LAWS ARE KILLING US ALL. YOU'VE TAKEN AWAY OUR FREEDOM. WE LIVE OUR LIVES IN FEAR OF WHAT TOMORROW BRINGS. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT. WHAT HAPPENED TO US? THIS ONCE GREAT NATION HAS COMPLETELY GONE TO SHIT. AND IF WE DON'T CHANGE SOONER OR LATER, WE'RE ALL GONNA FUCKING DIE.
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BADGE GRABBER Fallbrook, California
SOCAL ONE MAN ELEKTRO-NOIZE-CORE MUZIK. BORN IN LOS ANGELES AND BASED IN SAN DIEGO. NEW SONG "STENCH OF THE SHITHOUSE" OUT NOW.
BADGE GRABBER recommends:
FREAKY & NOIZY EAST LA PSYCH PUNK/PROG. SOME ABSOLUTELY BRAIN-WARPING TECHNICAL PROFICIENCY ON DISPLAY HERE. FUCKIN RULEZ.
go to album
MODERN NOIZE LEGENDS FROM IRELAND. A UNIQUE MIXTURE OF NOIZY POST-PUNK AND INDUSTRIAL DANCE/TEKNO. ONE OF MY BIGGEST MUZIKAL INSPIRATIONS.
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HORRIFICALLY BLEAK AND FOREBODING NOIZE/SLUDGE METAL FROM OKC. HAUNTING VOCALS & BRUTAL RIFFAGE WITH POUNDING INDUSTRIAL RHYTHMZ. ABSOLUTELY BONE & SOUL CRUSHING.
go to albumIf you like BADGE GRABBER, you may also like:
2023 Sampler
by The Ghost Is Clear Records
supported by 7 fans who also own “FALLOPIAN TUBE AMPLIFIER (LP)”
This is a good compilation of great bands from a great label. Many bands won’t be slept on now and the ghost is clear records is easily one of my favorite labels of the year.
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supported by 6 fans who also own “FALLOPIAN TUBE AMPLIFIER (LP)”
The amount of heft is felt through my body from the duel bassists and roaring aggressive drums. I look forward to hearing more and hope that they come to Chicago so I can be flung across the room by the sheer force of their sound.
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Revved-up and totally askew post-punk from Buffalo’s Ismatic Guru, with guitars that corkscrew like mad.
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